Article written

  • on 04.07.2011
  • at 03:38 PM
  • by KT

Top 10 Worst Sporting Excuses of All Time

After David Haye’s mauling (and subsequent moaning) at the weekend we got thinking about where this particular excuse would come in the top 10 sporting excuses of all time.

So we quickly came up with 9 more memorable excuses to complete our list. Here goes…

10. David Haye – 2011
After getting out-boxed for 12 rounds by Wladimir Klitschko in Germany, 30-year-old Haye blamed his poor performance on a broken toe suffered 3 weeks before the fight. He just forgot to mention it until after he was defeated.

9. Brian Cushing – 2010
NFL linebacker and Defensive Rookie of the Year tested for a banned substance but claimed that it was not his fault, blaming it on his ‘unique’ condition known as ‘overtrained athlete syndrome’ which he claimed caused a spikes in his testosterone, which led to the positive drugs test.

8. David James – 1997
In his early career David James was always well-known for his goalkeeping howlers, but when he conceded a hat-trick of spillages against Newcastle, Liverpool and PSG in’97, he claimed that his concentration was at an all-time low due to playing too many video-games, quoting: “I was getting carried away playing Tekken II and Tomb Raider for hours on end”.

7. Kenny Dalglish – 1998
Newcastle manager Kenny Dalglish sent his big names (including Alan Shearer) out but watched in disarray as his side struggle to a 1-1 draw against Conference side Stevenage Borough. But after the game Dalglish refuses to blame his players, instead venting his frustration at the balls which he claimed were “just too bouncy”.

6. Crystal Place Fans – 2011
Fans of Championship strugglers Crystal Palace called for their sexy cheerleaders, the originally-named ‘The Crystals’, to be culled after their performances were deemed to be too provocative and distracting for the players. At the time of the out-cry, Palace had an unbeaten home record, yet the cheerleaders seemed to take the brunt of the fans’ anger, not the players!

The Crystals - Crystal Palace cheerleaders

'The Crystals' were criticised by the Palace fans for 'distracting' the players during the games (No prizes for guessing why SHE was placed at the front).

5. The Ukrainian football team – 2006
The Ukranians blamed their 4-0 World Cup defeat to Spain on noisy frogs. Yes, noisy frogs. The team were staying in Potsdam, a small German village, and claimed that they were kept awake all night by the pesky amphibians croaking outside their hotel all night. One of their players, Valdislav Vashchuk said: “We all agreed we would take some sticks and go and hunt them!”.

4. Graeme Swann – 2010
Ashes-winning England cricketer Graeme Swann had to think on his feet when his Porsche was pulled over police officers at 3am and found to be over the drink-drive limit. He escaped a ban when he claimed that despite being out celebrating earlier in the night, he was driving to the supermarket ‘to buy screwdrivers to rescue his cat’ which he claimed was stuck beneath the floorboards in his house.

3. Richard Gasquet – 2009
Former Wimbledon semi-finalist Gasquet was cleared of taking cocaine and had his two-and-a-half month ban lifted when the tribunal believed his unbelievable excuse. He claimed that he had never taken cocaine, but that the traces found in his blood were contaminated as a result of kissing a waitress on a night out who ‘must have been a cocaine user’, obviously.

2. Ronnie O’Sullivan – 1997
The Rocket was leading the ’97 Masters Final 8-3 when a streaker ran around the arena delaying play for a minute or two. O’Sullivan then went on to lose the next 7 straight frames and therefore the match, blaming the streaker for his collapse.

And the winner is…

1. Sir Alex Ferguson/Man Utd – 1996
Manchester United travelled to the south coast to take on a struggling Southampton side at The Dell in 1996. After 45 minutes they found themselves 3-0 down and Sir Alex came out with his biggest excuse to date, blaming their new grey strip by saying his players couldn’t find each other as they were ‘blending into the crowd’. They changed their shirts at half-time but still went on to lose the match 3-1, highlighting what a poor excuse it was all along.

Southampton vs Man Utd

Man Utd's (in)famous 3-1 defeat at The Dell was blamed on the grey kit!

And now the Liverpool and Man City fans amongst you can sit back and enjoy both the 3-1 and 6-3 drubbings that the Saints handed out to Man Utd at The Dell in the ‘96 and ’97 seasons…

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